I Paint My Feelings Away
by ViolaTheGlaceon
Summary: Leo never had a favorite color. He loved them all. But as of lately, he's getting a little tired of seeing red.


Vio: Here's my attempt at another TMNT fic even though I have a much older one that needs some serious updating. This takes place during the 2003 series, and I'm only doing a series of one-shots with the prologue taking place when they're turtle tots.

WARNING! There will be blood and gore in this chapter and so on. This will be the only warning you'll get.

The turtles are around the ages of 11 to 12.

 **A/N: I DO NOT OWN TMNT!**

Please enjoy,

 **. . .**

 **Prologue**

 **. . .**

Leo hummed quietly to himself and turned to the next clean sheet of his sketchbook. He loved to draw and paint images that his many books would tell him. Sketching the illusions of towering mountains tipped with icy snow, vibrant fields full of many colorful flowers of all kinds, and even the endless depths of the ocean. There were also the few rare drawings of what he imagined war must be like. Leo hid them from the rest of his family, not wanting them to see his graphic depictions of battle. The books he read could be very descriptive with gore. With a shake of his head, he changed his focus to his projects. He had many unfinished projects that he promised to finish whenever he wasn't training, meditating with Master Splinter, or playing with his younger brothers.

The turtle tot's biggest project made him the proudest. He could hold his head high and gloat happily, always smiling when he looked up at the hanging portrait. It was a simple acrylic painting of a cherry blossom tree in full bloom, petals falling from the ever-reaching tree limbs. The blossoms were a light shade of cherry pink although, he had gone back to darken the inner part of said blossoms to a deeper shade for a more realistic look. The leaves and grass below ranged from a light seafoam to a vibrant emerald, and the tree itself was a polished hickory brown.

In the far background, the green colors stretch until they clash with mixed shades of grays for the faint mountains. High above the mountains are ivory clouds and a bright azure sky that covers the majority of the top half.

"That's not fair!"

Leo blinked at the unexpected yell, gently putting his sketchbook back in its place on his bookshelf. He slid his door open to see his three younger brothers down on the first level arguing. Raph's face was turning the color of his bandana, snarling at Mikey who just whined and pouted while Donnie clenched and unclenched his hands nervously. The olive-skinned turtle was also biting his lower lip – a sign that the third eldest was reaching his breaking point, so Leo quickly and carefully climbed down the steel ladder that had been placed for them to be able to reach their rooms.

As he drew closer to the three, Donnie saw him and darted to his side, "Leo!"

The other two paused and looked over just as he reached them, "What's going on?" He asked curiously, but Raph crossed his arms and turned away with a grunt.

"Raphie wants to go find Master Splinter because he hasn't come back yet!" He whined, baby blues watering, "And I wanted to come with him, but he won't let me!"

Ah, so _that_ was the problem.

Leo gave the red-banded turtle tot a stern glare, "Master Splinter gave us specific ord-"

Fierce golden orbs burn into his calm gray ones, "Yeah, yeah, Splinta' Junior! I know wha' he said, but I ain't waitin' any longer!"

Just the sight of his younger brother turning his back on him made Leo see red, but he kept his attitude in check, "You're not leaving the lair, Raphael Hamato."

The use of the emerald turtle's full name had everyone caught off guard. Raph craned his head around and sneered, "Who's gonna stop meh?"

Ever since Master Splinter had named him future leader of the Hamato Clan, the relationship between them seemed to disappear completely. No matter what Leo did, his hot-headed brother always tried to find his faults and throw them back into his face.

It hurt.

In order to hide his hurt, Leo began to throw his own insults back at his brother. Petty? Yes. Did he really care at the time? No.

Leo bared his teeth, "I will drag you back! Do _not_ test me, _Little Brother_!"

 _ **SNAP**_

Mikey yelped as Donnie dragged him back from almost being tackled by their older brother. For the next few minutes there were only blurs of emerald and shamrock green along with flashes of blue and red. When they finally separated, Leo had a split lip and was covered with rapidly darkening bruises, and Raph also had forming bruises of his own as well as a missing tooth.

"I don't know what the shell your problem is, Raph!" Leo snarled, "But I've had enough! What's your deal?!"

"My _deal_ is you!" Raph snarked back, stepping forward, "I'm tired of hearn' ya kiss-up ever time Splinta's around! Yer nothin' but a damn kiss-ass!"

"Wha-" Leo was cut off as Raph stalked over to him, their faces inches apart.

"I hate ya so damn much!" Mikey gasped, eyes wide while Donnie inhaled sharply.

"Raph-"

"Don' ya dare say mah name!" He was shaking now, and Leo swore he saw sadness flash in the other's eyes before being replaced by rage. Leo reached out, but Raph brutally pushed him back, causing him to lose his balance and fall down off the small ledge and right onto-

 _ **Schlunk**_

-a sharpened metal rod.

Crimson spurted from the chest wound, running down his arms and plastron. He chokes and coughs as thick, coppery blood flooded his mouth, spilling down his chin like a waterfall. Leo can do nothing as his fluids stain the concrete floor of their home. His vision slowly begins to fade, his mind coming to a halt, and his body slowly goes numb.

The last thing he sees is Raph staring down at him with horror and shock.

. . . . .

"My son?" Leo awoke to his father staring down at him with shock, "Leonardo?"

"Dad?" He asked, trying to clear his blurry eyes, "What happened?"

Loud sobs met his ears, and he was tackled by a heavy but small body like his own. His vision finally cleared, and he looked down to see Raph buried in his plastron, sobbing heavily and letting out hiccups every now and then. The sobbing turtle tot apologized over and over again as he nuzzled into his big brother's neck. More sobs intertwined with Raph's as Mikey and Donnie quickly joined in, cuddling up to their eldest brother.

"Dad?" Leo asked again and looked up at the elder rat who had a few tears of his own running down his furry cheeks, "Why are you all crying?"

Splinter frowned, "You do not remember, my son?" The rat's eyes flickered behind his son which did not go unnoticed by said child.

Leo turned and glanced around the lair, searching for whatever his father was looking at until he spotted _**it**_.

A single metal rod that had been misplaced, leaned against a pile of metals and was colored red with crimson droplets falling from the rusted tip.

* * *

I hope that was good! I have no clue where this idea came from, but I'm rolling with it! Please R&R! 😀


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